Tanning Animal Hides the Old Fashioned Way: With Brains!

As every Grandma tells her grandchildren - you can tan most animal hides with the animals brains! This is useful if you are trapped in the woods and have managed to down a 1600 pound bear with a simple spear, like in the Movie "The Edge". I'm sure as you watched Alec Baldwin wearing the bear skin with his well-manicured hands you said to yourself "Hey, wouldn't that skin rot and start smelling?"

Not if he tanned it with the Bear's BRAINS, I say!

Just bash up the brains and work it into the freshly skinned hide, careful to soak it in thoroughly. Hang it to dry, but before it gets completely dry soften it by sliding the skin back and forth - fur side up - over a wire, (or branch if you are stuck in the Alaskan wilderness). "It can't be that easy", you say - well, you're right. It is time consuming, and will have your wife complaining of the smell - and while you concentrate on the project there is always the danger of an Indian attack, but basically that's all there is to it.

So next time you hit that endangered fox with your new Hummer, don't fret....use some brains! After all, Alec Baldwin's press agent would have wanted it that way.